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Month: September 2017

5 Reasons Speed Dating Breaks The Online Dating Myth

Posted on September 29, 2017 in Uncategorized

We are a culture obsessed with perfection. We photo shop are photos, analyze our profiles for perfect wording in order to create the best possible impression on paper. The problem is it’s still on paper. You can can go through thousands of online profiles and photos looking for the perfect person and still not talk to a single person.

I held my first event as a Los Angeles speed dating event host last week and was shocked when 24 normal, friendly, everyday people showed up. When I first met these people I thought these nice people are never going to find a match. After all I live in Los Angeles where everyone is either a model or an actor.These people were no where near that level of “perfection.”

To my pleasure these speed dating participants came up with 16 double matches between them. Meaning that 67% agreed to speak to each other again! It was especially rewarding to watch one of my male coaching clients come to life and get 2 double matches after being down on himself and not dating for 8 months.

I consider it a victory for humankind and the power of connection that at the end of the day all we really want is to talk and feel connection. I want to congratulate those people who came and thank them for encouraging me to be myself. Morale of the story in my experience online dating focuses on the myth of perfection, speed dating is for real people who like real people.

Five Reasons Why You Should Speed Date vs. Online Dating!

1. Speed Dating or Singles Mixers Have No Room For Catfishing! (Catfishing- the act of deceiving someone you meet online by portraying yourself to be someone you’re not). Thankfully, with speed dating, you meet people in person. They don’t have a chance to deceive you with a fake profile. What you see is what you get.

2. You are able to see if there is chemistry right away. Often, what happens with online dating is you may have a good connection online, but chemistry falls flat when you meet in person. You’re able to look for compatibility within a person to person meeting.

3. Speed Dating is less superficial than online dating. Online daters, at first, evaluate someone’s physical attractiveness, body type and general lifestyle. With speed dating you get the chance to discover your prospects personality as well as the physical.

4. The participants have paid a fee to attend and usually are professionals with careers and money available for recreational activities. At a free online dating site they may be surfing the web because they have nothing else to do!

5. No matter what you put on your online profile, you will still get people way out of your desired age range or location sending you messages! The basic speed dating event is targeted to local areas and specific age ranges so you will not be out of place at an event and know what to expect.

You can always mix the two: Why not invite one (or two) of your online prospects if they’re in the area. It’s the safe way to meet in person!

Playing Safe On The Internet – Don’t Get Catfished

Posted on September 27, 2017 in Uncategorized

Catfishing has been in the news a lot lately. The reality is that dating on-line is a great way to initially meet someone but how do you know if they are real? There comes a point and it should be long before your on-line connection goes on for a year or 2 when you need to verify that who you are talking to is indeed who they say they are.

If you are using a dating website, they all have security to protect their users, it is there for a good reason. If someone asks you to go outside of the sites methods of contact, as in send me your phone number so we can text instead of spending money, odds are good they are scamming. What are they doing on the site if they can’t afford to spend a few dollars to pursue a relationship? In some cases the sites are free in which case there is no reason to go outside their contact system.

Don’t give out your phone number until you verify that someone is “real”.

The easiest way to weed out the lazy fishers is to ask for a video chat. Scammers can send you pictures but they can’t fake what they look like on an on-line video chat. Scammers will come up with all sorts of excuses on why they can’t video. I have done a lot of travelling in countries like Bolivia, Guatemala, El Salvador, Honduras, in all of these countries there are internet cafes & they all have cameras on the computers, they are very cheap to use, less than $1.00 an hour. There are very few places in the world where someone would not be able to access a computer with a camera. If someone can contact you via the Internet and text they can do a video chat.

I am always amazed when I hear about people giving money to people they have never met. I don’t give money to my family members, no way I would give it to a stranger who’s only contact has been via the Internet. This is a total red flag! People can ask for money without really asking, you know the “My car broke down, wish I could afford to fix it, won’t be able to make my job interview next week”. Don’t fall for it, anyone who is legitimately looking for a relationship will not ask you for money or hint that you should give it to them. You don’t know this person, it is not your responsibility to take care of them. These people will make it sound like you are the only one who can “save” them to bring out the protector we all have in us, they know how to play people to get what they want.

If you have chatted with someone online and they are immediately complimenting you & telling you how crazy they are about you.. Things are off. The people who scam need to get you into the loop fast, time is money to them. No one who is looking for a real relationship will behave this way. They will want to get to know you and build a foundation before they decide if you are what they are looking for. Imagine if in the real world you went on 2 dates with someone and they started talking about marriage and sharing finances.. You would get a restraining order and put them in the stalker pile never to be seen again.

Keep in mind that scammers are very good at what they do. They can come up with a million excuses and with rose colored glasses firmly in place many people fall for them. Your safest bet is to trust no one until they prove to you that they are who they say they are. If someone cares about you and really wants to have a relationship with you they will understand why you are cautious and in fact your safety, comfort and welfare should be one of their main priorities.

Cyber Crooks Go “Phishing”

Posted on September 26, 2017 in Uncategorized

“Phishing,” the latest craze among online evil-doers, has nothing to do with sitting at the end of a dock on a sunny afternoon dangling a worm to entice hungry catfish.

But, if you take their bait, this new breed of online con artist will hook you, reel you in, and take you for every dollar you have… or worse.

“Phishing” describes a combination of techniques used by cyber crooks to bait people into giving up sensitive personal data such as credit card numbers, social security numbers, bank account numbers, dates of birth and more.

Their techniques work so well that, according to FraudWatchInternational.com [http://FraudWatchInternational.com], “phishing” rates as the fastest growing scam on the Internet.

Here’s the basic pattern for a “phishing” scam…

You receive a very official email that appears to originate from a legitimate source, such as a bank, eBay, PayPal, a major retailer, or some other well known entity.

In the email it tells you that something bad is about to happen unless you act quickly.

Typically it tells you that your account is about to get closed, that someone appears to have stolen your identity, or even that someone opened a fraudulent account using your name.

In order to help straighten everything out, you need to click a link in the email and provide some basic account information so they can verify your identity and then give you additional details so you can help get everything cleared up.

Once you give up your information… it’s all over but the crying!

After getting your information, these cyber-bandits can empty your bank accounts, deplete your PayPal accounts, run up your credit card balances, open new credit accounts, assume your identity and much worse.

An especially disturbing new variation of this scam specifically targets online business owners and affiliate marketers.

In this con, the scammer’s email informs you that they’ve just sent $1,219.43 (or a similar big but believable amount) in affiliate commissions to you via PayPal.

They need you to log into your PayPal account to verify receipt of the money and then email them back to confirm you got it.

Since you’re so excited at the possibility of an unexpected pay day, you click the link to go to PayPal, log in, and BANG! They have your PayPal login information and can empty your account.

This new “phishing” style scam works extremely well for 2 basic reasons.

First, by exploiting your sense of urgency created by fear or greed, crooks get you to click the link and give them your information without thinking.

Second, the scammers use a variety of cloaking and spoofing techniques to make their emails and websites appear totally legitimate, making it extremely hard to spot a fake website, especially when they’ve first whipped you into an emotional frenzy.

The good news, however, is that you can protect yourself relatively easily against this type of cyber-crime with basic software and common sense.

Most of these scams get delivered to you via Spam (unsolicited email), so a good spam blocker will cut down on many of them even making it to your inbox.

If you receive an email that looks legitimate and you want to respond, Stop – Wait – Think!

Verify all phone numbers with a physical phone book or online phone directory like w

Look for spelling and grammatical errors that make it look like someone who doesn’t speak English or your native language very well wrote it.

Never click the link provided in the email, but go directly to the website by typing in the main address of the site yourself (paypall).

Forward the email to the main email address of the website or call the customer service number on the main website you typed in yourself and ask if it is in fact legitimate.

Above all remember this:

Your bank, credit card company, PayPal, eBay and anyone else you deal with online already knows your account number, username, password or any other account specific information.

They don’t need to email you for ANY reason to ask you to confirm your information — so NEVER respond to email requests for your account or personal details.

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